Corey: Hi! My name is Corey Quinn and I’m the founder of MyCoachMatch.com. We are a site that matches coaches with clients based on fit. I am here with Pauline Haynes. She is a personal life coach. She specializes in working with women who are making a transition from one life stage to the next. Welcome Pauline.
Personal Life Coach Pauline Haynes: Thanks Corey. It’s a pleasure to be here.
Corey: Pleasure to have you. So could you share with us, why are you a coach?
Personal Life Coach Pauline Haynes: I think I can put it very simply and I’d say it’s because I care, because I like people, because I am curious about people, and because I have this passion to make a difference and to serve, and I think it all started when I think for about 10 years I worked with people living with AIDS. It gave me an opportunity of being in a very intimate setting with people who were oftentimes, they were at the end of their lives, but they didn’t feel like they had stopped living. They were in a place of almost bliss. They were in a place of joy, of fulfilment, of letting go, of giving over, of just being very centered in who they were, and I felt such a tremendous honor in being with them at such a vulnerable time in their lives, and I was able to listen to them, to hear them, to hear the joys of their lives, to hear the sorrows of their lives, and that made me realize that – there was something I could do and after 10 years, lots of people I have worked with have passed away, and then I needed to take a break. Contrast that with working in a corporation and for a long time, I did cultural awareness training, and what I noticed with teaching corporations is that they are very – they never take all of themselves to work because everybody has to wear a mask and the mask has to do with, how do I fit in to the culture of this corporation? And oftentimes if they’re in sales, it’s about, how do I upsell the next client? How do I bring in more revenue? If it’s in production, it’s how do I do this quicker, faster, more efficiently? And if they are doing anything creative, it is usually within the confines of the company culture, and it is not that they don’t enjoy their job, but it is almost as if all of them couldn’t be at work. For instance, it didn’t matter where they were raised, it didn’t matter what their cultures were, it didn’t matter what their socioeconomics were, it didn’t matter what their politics or their religion were. All those things had to be left at the door. And so when they came in to work, they had to be at work based on, how do I fit in to this culture? And because I did that, people would come up to me and say, wow! I am so glad that you brought some awareness about what it is to be who I am, but I can’t be who I am at work. And so, there is always this part of them that say, I want more and I’m dying inside and I really want to feel fulfilled. I want to be full of who I am authentically, but they didn’t have the opportunity of doing that. From listening to those speakers over and over again that I realize that our corporations are not set up to actually benefit the individuals. Now, this is not to say that corporations are bad. I’m not saying that at all. I am saying that what it is that we are all needing, seeking as human beings is to have that sense of fulfilment and it is because of that sense of fulfilment and the lack that existed in some of the corporations with which I was teaching that I realized that there’s a need for people to just connect on the human level. So that in a word, that is what got me into coaching.
Corey: That’s wonderful. It’s great.
Personal Life Coach Pauline Haynes: Thanks.
Corey: So when should someone come in to see you as a personal coach?
Personal Life Coach Pauline Haynes: I think people should come and see me when they are going through a time in their lives when they realize that the way my life is right now is not the way I want it to be, and I believe that everyone of us can get to that stage when something just isn’t working. We know what we want and we don’t exactly know how to get there, but we know that business as usual, isn’t it. But sometimes when you are sick and tired of being sick and tired, you have that goal – let’s face it. Each and every one of us, we have dreams. We have dreams to do, be, or experience something more and whatever the constraints are, sometimes we get stuck in that place that we think we can’t do any better, and sometimes we know the answers. The truth is, most of us know exactly what it is that we need to do.
Corey: Could you share with me Pauline, who is an ideal client for you?
Personal Life Coach Pauline Haynes: The ideal clients for me are the people who are in transition. The people who are wanting to streamline their lives – lives maybe kind of going spinning out of control and they’re just wanting to have some tools and some guidance about how to get to where they want to go, people who are needing some motivation, people who are searching for their lives’ purpose, people who are committed to doing something better, different, to make their live be excellent. The truth is, I think we all want joy, fulfilment, and happiness in our lives. It’s very simple. It’s not complicated. So it’s when that – it’s like you are going along and everything is fine and then something happens and then day after day, you have this nagging feeling that there’s got to be more, there’s got to be more, there’s got to be more. That’s where I come in.
Corey: Okay. That’s great. So in your experience as a coach, how important is match between a coach and a client?
Personal Life Coach Pauline Haynes: Oh my gosh! It is absolutely vital, and if there’s such an intimacy that you’re sharing with each other – in fact, as a coach, I am sometimes hearing things that my client does not share with anybody else and the client has to know that I can trust this person to be honest, to be truthful, and truth is something undervalued or underappreciated, and when you are in a place that you can be really honest with the things that you’ve done, the things that you want to do, the things that you don’t like, it takes a certain amount of courage to do that, and so, you have to have that symbiotic relationship with somebody to be able to be – it’s in essence, being naked in front of a person and being okay with that and to know that you are going to be held in that vulnerability to say exactly what it is that you want to say to be who you are and not be judged – to just be accepted, appreciated, to be listened to, and to be cherished in that vulnerable space and it is only from that space that I think people can begin to make changes and that is very vital for me, so that relationship is key. It is even more important than the techniques that you use because the techniques becomes secondary. Again, I come back to the human nature of who we are, and I come from the very heart-centered place and I think if the heart is not connected, then there’s very little less for us to work with.
Corey: That’s great. Could you share with us a success story?
Personal Life Coach Pauline Haynes: Oh my goodness! I’ve had several, but the one that just came to mind is of a young woman I’ve worked with for – I think it’s about four months, and she was at that she was feeling unfulfilled. She was feeling creatively stuck and within that four months, she has written a book which has been published. I have never known anyone be so totally focused on their next steps. I mean, that gives me joy because it is like putting a seed on the ground and the seed had been germinating and germinating and I came in, and just holding our hands and walking with her to the point of getting that book to publication and it’s done, and that took four months. It is totally unheard of for anyone to complete a novel in such a short space of time. It’s her very first book and I’m so happy for her.
Personal Life Coach Pauline Haynes: Thanks! And the process works.
Corey: Yeah. That’s great. Well, thank you Pauline so much for being with us here today.
Personal Life Coach Pauline Haynes: Corey, thank you so much for having me and I look forward to having more people come into your website and me doing more service to more people.
Corey: Wonderful. Thank you so much.
About Life Coach Pauline Haynes:
Are you frustrated with an aspect of your life, and not sure how to stop making the same choices?
Are you at a cross road, feeling stuck and need guidance to help you find the next steps?
Maybe you are simply hungry for more peace, joy, passion, contentment, and love in your life.
There is hope!!!
Through a collaborative process you and I can find the right strategies, chart a course, set goals, take the necessary steps to get you to your desired outcome.
I will be your accountability partner to guide you, to push you, to be gentle with you, and to be firm with you until you arrive at your pre-determined destination to be transformed into the pure essence of you.
As a coach I come from a heart-centered space, using my intuition and interpersonal communication skills. I honor you as the expert in your life. The education I received is from:
- Landmark Education
- The Christopher Howard Leadership and Coaching Academy
- Life Coach Institute of Orange County
- A PhD in “Hard Knocks”