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General Life Coaching Spiritual Coaching

How to Be an Optimist

optimistic

If you are generally a pessimist at heart, then you are not doomed to always see the worst. By making a few adjustments to your thinking, you can become an optimist, which will help you cope with the difficult times in life while also enjoying each day to the fullest. Here are some tricks that will teach you how to think positively.

Listen to Yourself

Before you can become an optimist, you have to listen to the things you say to others so that you can hear how often you are being negative. You will also need to keep track of your negative thoughts by writing them down throughout the day. By identifying exactly when you are being pessimistic, you can start to change your pattern of thinking.

Think Positively


Back It Up
Once you have identified your negative thoughts, you can start to counter them with something that

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is positive. You may initially feel uncomfortable and unrealistic when you force yourself to see the sunny side of life, and you may feel as though you are being deceitful by letting your pessimistic thoughts take a back seat. However, this addition of positive thinking will help you slowly transform your overall outlook.

As you find yourself having negative thoughts during the day, take the time to write them down. Next to each thought, write down the evidence that supports your negative feeling. You can then add another column with a conflicting positive thought and its evidence. After you have practiced this for a while, you will soon be able to identify the evidence for each feeling without writing everything down.

Give Positive Feedback

Once you have started finding the positive aspects of your daily life, you can start giving others positive feedback. You can tell your coworker that he did well during his presentation or praise your daughter for her high grade in math. Your praise should also extend to yourself. Admit that you have done well at something or that you have succeeded where someone else has failed. Your positive feedback for others will brighten their day and encourage them to continue working hard, and you will start to feel a sense of confidence that may have been missing before.

You don’t need to live your life focusing on the negative things that happen. With a healthy dose of optimism, you can start enjoying the things that you experience daily while also bringing joy and positive thoughts to those around you.

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General Life Coaching Personal Coaching

Steps for Gaining Wisdom

wisdomMany of us go through life hoping to become wiser as we get older, but there is much more to wisdom than just age and intelligence. Wisdom requires us to use our experiences to help us form sound and reasonable judgments, and we can take some excellent advice from the leaders around us who are considered to be truly wise.

Start Now

You don’t have to wait until you are older or smarter to be wise, and you don’t need to have a great deal of life experience under your belt. Your level of wisdom has nothing to do with your age, which means that a 20-year-old college student can be just as wise as someone who is 80 years old. Rather than waiting for life to teach you lessons through a number of experiences, start applying the lessons you have already learned. As you live each day, reflect on what you have done in the past and how the outcome has affected your life. You can then use those reflections to help you draw sound and sensible conclusions.

Embrace Different Perspectives

Wise people are able to analyze situations from different points of view rather than focusing on a single perspective. For example, a wise person who has been asked for advice will consider social influences, cultural differences and an individual’s life history before offering their opinions. They are also able to look at opposing perspectives and take both positions into account as they are forming views about disagreements. By carefully considering individual factors and each viewpoint when you are asked for your opinion, you will be able to help others better understand their own perspectives and how they should address their problems.

Incorporate Common Good and Self-Interest

Wisdom embraces a balance of common good and self-interest, which means that a wise person will help others while also accomplishing their own goals. In order to be wise, you must set aside your focus on your personal desires so that you can benefit others. However, you must also find success and joy in what you do each day. You must blend your own personal goals with your desire to make the world a better place.

Wisdom is not something that is automatically granted as you get older, but these strategies will help you apply the lessons you have learned during your life to help you make wise decisions each day. You may even find that your life begins to hold more value and significance.

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General Personal Coaching Relationship Coaching Success Coaching

The Secret to Being Happy

Research has indicated that happiness is beneficial for many reasons.When our ancestors were focused on hunting and gathering, they were not concerned about finding fulfillment in life. Their purpose was to keep themselves and their loved ones alive by securing a safe place to live and finding enough food on which to survive. Today’s culture, however, has prompted Americans to look beyond basic survival strategies and start thinking about how to enjoy their lives to the fullest. This quest for happiness has led to many books, seminars and

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counseling sessions that are designed to help people find joy in living.

Why Search for Happiness?

Research has indicated that happiness is beneficial for many reasons. The chemicals that are released when happiness is felt may result in an increase in financial earnings, a higher level of creativity and a stronger immune system. Happiness is not just a feeling. While it is an emotion, happiness can have a powerful effect on the body. A burst of joy lasts longer than the effects of dopamine, and it can affect how you make everyday choices and decisions. If you want to become a happier person, you need to adjust your perspective about the things that you experience daily.

Taking Risks

Happy people often take measured risks. They are not

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afraid to try something new or different, and they accept the fact that they may not like the outcome. They may feel a small amount of anxiety over their decision, but they also know that their willingness to step outside of their comfort zone will lead them to grow and develop as a person. As you pursue happiness, use your sense of curiosity about the unknown to encourage you to explore

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and extend your horizons. However, you should also allow yourself to enjoy familiar pleasures so that you have a healthy balance.

Finding Joy in Others’ Fortunes

Happy people do not dwell on what they don’t have or what they wish they had, and this lack of jealousy allows them to find joy in their friends’ successes and victories. By sharing these celebrations with others, you can strengthen your relationships so that you also benefit when you have good news to share with your friends and family.

While finding happiness is important and beneficial, it should not be the ultimate goal in life. Studies show that people who experience extensive bursts of pleasure may not appreciate the smaller joys that they encounter. To truly benefit from happiness, you must work toward a purpose in life while enjoying the process that it takes to achieve your goals.

Flickr img by julesjulesjules m

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General Life Coaching

Mixing Friendship and Politics

Typically, we like to surround ourselves with people who share our beliefs and opinions. However, there are bound to be instances when we do not agree. Such is likely the case with politics and if you are like the vast majority of people, you may find your Facebook wall filled with an array of support these days for one political candidate or another. Although some of the opinions expressed mirror your own, others may be directly contrary to what you feel. And no matter how important the friendship is, you will probably find yourself somewhat irritated when your views are challenged.

politics american flagStill, you are probably not going to change the mind of a friend anymore than he is going to change your way of thinking. Fortunately, there are some ways to handle this situation without ending a friendship.

Follow Mom’s advice

If you grew up with siblings, you probably had your fair share of taunting and teasing. If you are like most of us, whenever you would bring your concerns to your mother, her response was probably to ignore the offensive behavior. This advice is just as good today as it was then. You must ask yourself, “Is it really necessary to spend precious time and energy on this?” If it is not harming you, just ignore it and move on.

Put your settings to use

If you simply cannot ignore the post on your own, technology can help. Facebook and other social networking sites have settings for a reason: if you do not want to see something that has been posted by another user, hide the post. The poster will never know you have hidden their content and you will not have to see it anymore. Problem solved.

Remember why this person is a friend

If the person who is posting things you would rather not see is a close friend or relative, chances are you have known his views for a while and have learned to appreciate him in spite of them. If the poster is a lesser known Facebook “friend,” it may serve you better to simply remove them.

Think before you respond

Remember that everyone is entitled to an opinion and differences keep life interesting. Take a moment to collect your thoughts and calm down. Then, if you still feel compelled to respond to a post remember that the internet is a public forum and your comment will become visible to the masses. Anger can cause a whirlwind of problems, quickly turning a small disagreement into a nasty fight. You may even find yourself in a heated debate with a complete stranger who merely read your response. So, think twice before responding and be prepared for any subsequent reactions.

Take personal responsibility

No one can force you to participate in an argument or discussion. If you do not like the way a situation is affecting you, remove yourself from it. You have the option to simply cease communication regarding the matter or you can leave a final response that tells the other person or people that you feel too much energy has been wasted on the issue and agree to disagree. If the debate continues on without you, so be it. But at least you will no longer be part of it.

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General Life Coaching Success Coaching

Preventing Identity Theft

In today’s modern world, it is not uncommon to pay bills, shop and even handle banking completely online. The internet has offered us the convenience of a full range of products and services from the comfort of home, all at the click of a mouse. Still, with all of this convenience, we are becoming increasingly more vulnerable to identity theft. Although there is little that can be done to stop these thieves from preying on unsuspecting victims, there are some precautions that may help in thwarting the attempts of would-be thieves.

Handle with care.

For many individuals, identity theft conjures up images of hackers extracting personal information from online transactions. However, while this is certainly a threat, traditional mail can pose a risk, as well. When mailing bill payments and other sensitive information, avoid unsecured curbside mailboxes. Instead, use a freestanding United States Postal Service mailbox or take such items directly to the post office and mail them from an inside drop box.

Be mindful of ATM machines.

With added convenience comes added concern. When using an ATM machine, observe your surroundings to see if anyone may be standing too closely. While no one wants to wrongfully accuse someone of a criminal act, the fact remains that people have been known to use camera phone to photograph debit and credit card numbers, along with pin numbers, only to later make fraudulent purchases. Always shield your transaction with one hand, even if it does not appear that anyone can see.

Is the website secure?

One of the easiest ways to determine if the website you are about to use has a secure connection is to look at the address when you are about to make a payment. Any address with “https” is secure, because that is what the “s” means. If the address does not contain an “s”, do not give your card number, without a secure connection, you are making your information vulnerable to thieves.

Be proactive.

Make it a habit to monitor bank and credit statements regularly, to catch any unfamiliar charges immediately. Moreover, take advantage of the free annual copy of your credit report, which is offered by all three major credit reporting agencies. Many people have been able to stop identity thieves early by monitoring accounts and charges that are open in their names.

It is truly sickening that we live in a society that forces us to be so suspicious. However being vigilant is often our only defense. By taking a few simple steps, we can prevent ourselves from becoming victims. The earlier thieves are caught, the better chance we have of regaining our financial reputation. Never assume you cannot become a victim. We are all vulnerable and must take precautions.

(photo credit)

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Business Coaching General

When to Hire a Business Coach

Starting a new business can be one of the most exciting undertakings an individual ever faces. Choosing the perfect location, giving the business a distinctive name and researching

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the best methods for introducing a new product or service to the local market can be exhilarating. In contrast, choosing ideal staff members, managing a budget and learning about market trends can prove overwhelming. While becoming an entrepreneur does not come with instructions, a sharp, well-informed guide could mean the difference between success and failure.

find a business coach for youHowever, finding such a guide can be a challenge in and of itself. Are all of the “rules” of running a successful business written and secretly filed in some special place unbeknownst to all but a select few within some secret society? Not exactly, but there is

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a method of accessing valuable tools, tricks and answers about starting, managing and maintaining a profitable organization. While there is no comprehensive manual that encompasses every scenario that a business will encounter, there are professional business coaches who can offer experience-based knowledge, insight and advice from an external perspective.

Since not all business coaches are created equally, knowing what to expect when hiring a business coach can save time, money and aggravation.

The Truth Hurts

While it is important to establish a good rapport, the job of a business coach is not to make his clients feel better about themselves. There is a good possibility that a business coach will ask uncomfortable questions and point out things about the business that need improvement. But, no matter how much it may sting, he has a professional obligation to offer constructive criticism and suggest improvements to existing policies and procedures. While it may be difficult for a business owner to admit that his methods are ineffective, but if he is never informed of his inadequacies, how can he expect to be successful?

A New Perspective

Countless companies have failed because someone’s ego got in the way of seeing things in a different light. In hiring a business coach, an individual must be willing to take a hard look at his business, staff and even himself. He has to make a commitment to listen to and genuinely consider ideas that the business coach may offer. This can include anything from a change in the name to a new location or adding new products and services.

The Cost

While a business coach is not a volunteer, the cost here is actually referring to the time and money spent on updates and additions to make the business what it could be. Still, these costs are merely small investments in the future of the business.

A Business Coach Cannot Perform Miracles

Although he can draw from experience to make suggestions, a business coach does not have special powers to make things happen by magic. In addition to listening and applying the advice of the coach, having a successful and profitable business requires a lot of time and hard work. An individual having the attitude that a business coach is the quick and easy solution to solving problems is only setting himself up for failure.

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General

The Four Golden Questions

1. Do I want the experience I’m having?

2. What do I want instead?

3. How will I know when I have what

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I want?

4. What’s stopping me from having what I want?

– Dr. Robert Dee McDonald

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General

MyCoachMatch.com Founder Corey Quinn in Featured Article

MyCoachMatch.com’s founder, Corey Quinn,

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has been featured on David P. Diana’s article on the “Not Most People” List. This list features inspiring people who are walking their unique path with courage, genuineness, and conviction.

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Meet the MyCoachMatch.com Team

Come meet us in person at this week’s Psychotherapy Networker conference in Washington DC. We are eagerly looking forward to making new connections with coaches, therapists, thought leaders in the mental health industry, as well as spend time with our friends and colleagues.

If you are attending the show, please be sure to stop by our booth. We’d love to meet you and hear your story.

Our booth is number 620.

Here is the conference website: http://www.psychotherapynetworker.org/symposium-2011

Update: Here is a photo from our booth at the conference:

Corey and Melissa at PN conference

 

Corey at a panel discussion

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Corey

Founder
MyTherapistMatch.com
MyCoachMatch.com

 

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For coaches General Life Coaching

Oprah Winfrey’s OWN Launches

January 1, 2011 isn’t just the start of a new year – it’s also the start for Oprah Winfrey’s new cable channel OWN. Although running her own network appears to be a new venture for Oprah, the truth is that Oprah has been running something akin to a network for a long time in the form of the Oprah Winfrey Show. Similar to a network that features different shows that share a particular theme, Oprah’s show featured regular segments that crossed into multiple genres while remaining true to an overarching brand and theme.

For Oprah, life coach to the masses, these themes include celebrity role models and self-actualization. Oprah’s lesson to us all seems to be that if you observe and adopt the habits and practices of Oprah and of her celebrity endorsees, you will be able to “be your best self.” This concept, which proved successful for her talk show, is what defines OWN. Many of the shows airing on OWN follow the Oprah formula that calls for celebrities, inspiring stories, and best of all, celebrities with touching tales. Oprah’s special touch is to take those celebrities and stories and spin them in such a way that makes it personal for the viewers.

The biggest problem Oprah faces with OWN is distinguishing it from the competition. Cable channels have had decades to adopt Oprah’s tactics for their own shows. But Oprah has an edge over the rest of them – 25 years of being on air. If she can capitalize on the personal relationship she has with her audience of millions, there’s no reason why OWN shouldn’t be as big as a success as the Oprah Winfrey Show.